October Top Ten: Fall Clichés

By The Voices

1)Paying $20 to sit on some hay and have people in costumes shout at you.

2)Unavoidably having to stick your hands in the orange, sticky mess of a pumpkin, only to attempt an extremely difficult carving design and have it fail miserably. At least you can plot your revenge and bake the seeds of that disaster into a delicious, salty snack that will leave your molars in pieces.

3)PSL are literally the best thing ever made. You can’t even… (For those unfamiliar with the term “PSL,” head over to Starbucks and order possibly one of the most amazing, definitely the most cliché, drinks of fall.)

4)Jumping into that leaf pile that you’ve been raking in the surprisingly hot sun is one of the most satisfying feelings man can experience. The crunch of leaves under you is great, and obviously there is no risk to the numerous ticks waiting for the opportune moment to suck your blood. No biggie.

5)Being able to get away with the comfiest outfit 24/7 in wearing a sweater, scarf, and the boots that go along with everything you own. Thank you cold-ish weather.

6)Wishing you were five so that you could pull off those adorable overalls and ride the pony at the apple orchard, only to remind yourself that you are an adult – you’re simply too short to reach any of the decent apples left on the trees.

7)Being invited to a Halloween party when you weren’t planning on doing anything is… “awesome.” Yay, now you get to go spend forty bucks on a costume, and socialize with people, how great for you.

8)“What’s that? It’s October? Here, let me show you every mediocre 1980s horror film until you can quote Halloween III: Season of the Witch in its entirety.”


9)Waking up at the crack of dawn only to find that its pitch black out until you leave for the bus, which, as it gets colder out, inevitably arrives later to make sure your fingers are frozen through and through.  

10)And what have we here? A warm mug full of fragrant, sweet cider? Well, don’t mind if I do! I’ll just have a sip or two and NOPE THAT IS VERY HOT THAT IS VERY HOT INDEED.


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