November Top Ten: Top Ten Late Autumn Traditions

By The Voices

1)Enjoying that one last savory crescent roll only to tell yourself: “That’s it! No more!” and then continuing to stuff your face full of Thanksgiving goodies because its all in the name of the holiday. (Keep telling yourself that)

2)Having to put up with the Christmas music that begins playing as soon as November starts and realizing that it will only start even earlier next year.

3)Spending forty dollars on the perfect facial hair gel so you can perfect that Movember ‘stache.

4)Pretending who have a clue about what’s going on in football. Hooray Bears! Fly high, little Eagles!

5)Reminding yourself that you have “health goals” and then reminding yourself that New Years is coming and you can totally postpone your current “health goals” until then.

6)Speaking of which, coming up with a new health goal for every slice of pecan pie you eat. I’ve already got eight for January. And I’m very ambitious.

7)Constantly checking your bank account status to make sure you can afford the holidays, even though it is only November and those don’t technically start until late December.

8)Understanding that Walmart is off limits for Black Friday because you don’t want to become this years newest, most fashion forward doormat at three o’clock in the morning.

9)Sitting on the couch at ten o’clock in the morning, totally engrossed in the image (on the grainy television that your grandfather prizes, no less) of a large balloon turkey and what appears to be a marching band? No that’s a color guard–look at the flags. No that one guy definitely has a trumpet. That’s not a trumpet, it’s a baton. Why would his baton be in his mouth? Hmm?

10)The age-old argument between the liberal aunt and the conservative aunt about when the kids should be allowed to start drinking; who will shed the first tear this year?

 

 

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